You do not pull your triggers; your past does.
There are moments when you feel exhausted and unable to move forward. You try to stay positive, to follow your plan, yet you find yourself pulled into a dark loop when your nervous system recognizes something familiar – and you become triggered by what we call visible sparks and/or invisible flashes.
Visible sparks:
• the facial expression of somebody else
• the tone with which someone speaks to you
• the situation; for instance, being ignored, rejected, or ridiculed
Invisible flashes:
• internal thoughts
• memory
Your body carries the emotional imprints of burdens and wounds which remain, stored beneath the surface; these memories can be activated and manifested as irritation, avoidance or shutting down, or losing your voice.
In TCM we know that in these situations your channels begin to contract and Qi starts to stagnate. Energy rushes upward, too quickly to the head, and suddenly you may feel reactive. For example, you may feel anger, without fully understanding why, if no one has done anything wrong in that moment. Yet somehow, your internal self is not happy; something within you is unsettled and unresolved when these emotions have been stirred.
In such cases, your Qi is no longer grounded. It rises into urgency, under pressure, as if everything must be completed, controlled, and resolved right now.
Why?
Because somewhere, deep within you, there is the belief that if you don’t finish everything, there will be another trigger which may make you feel not good enough, rejected, or ignored, and so on… The nervous system stays trapped, unable to relax or soften, as it is constantly trying to defend itself against the next trigger.
Years of constant vigilance against triggers leads to emptiness and burnout.
So, you need to ask yourself: can you pour from an empty vessel?
The answer is no – you cannot continue forever in this state of burnout.
Healing doesn’t come from supressing triggers, nor from controlling every outcome.
Healing begins with awareness.
So, what exactly is required now?
• Shift the energetic dynamic within you.
• Let go and have faith; allow trust to emerge.
• Observe your emotions without resistance.
• Don’t react unwisely. Instead, respond consciously.
Let expansion to grow:
• Notice where your mind is constantly directing you.
• Observe whether you feel like your true self, or like no one at all.
• Refuse to shrink.
• Acknowledge the trigger, but do not become it.
• Gently, expand yourself into the safety of the present moment.
